He gave me a child who needed to be taught and he gave me the skills to teach her. Yes, she had therapists, but they told me what to do and I did it!
Characteristics of a High Need Baby:
God gave me the child I was supposed to have and then he gave me the skills to give her what she needed. It is that simple. I feel sadness for Gillian. I am just so, so, sad for her. Because she could have chosen to accept her sweet boy and be the best mom for him, but instead as she says in her own words, she never came to terms with his disability. I do not think she ever saw him as anything but a mistake.
- The Cambridge Companion to the Bible (Cambridge Companions to Religion).
- Co-operative Code Questions & Answers (Q&A Series Book 1).
- Petrella at Q (Patrick Petrella).
- Profile Menu.
- Regional Economic Outlook, May 2010: Western Hemisphere - Taking Advantage of Tailwinds (World Economic and Financial Surveys).
And I think she missed out on a lot. Side note: please go read the article. Listen, mamas. All our kids will have some sort of issue. Some may struggle academically, others behaviorally, some may sail through their school and teen years and then have trouble functioning as a young adult. Some of your daughters may struggle as young mothers.
Listen, listen, listen: whatever your child needs at any stage, you can give it to them. I am not saying you can magically become a surgeon if they need an operation, but you can offer emotional and physical support and guidance. One of the things that surprised me about motherhood was how so unnatural it is to me.
It is hard. All the sacrifice is hard. And I am selfish. And yet…I think I am doing ok, because of this:. So how often should you breastfeed your high need baby? As frequently as baby needs, yet not to the extent of wearing out the feeder. I nurse around an average of 18 times a day. I know this sounds like a lot of nursing, but there is never a schedule to it. Either she lets me know or I just start it. It always works out.
More Discipline Isn't The Answer For A High-Maintenance 'Orchid Child’
Nursing is never a hassle or bother. It seems like we are always in harmony. We just nurse whenever or wherever Lindsey or I start it.
Early on these smart infants learn that the breast or bottle is not only a source of nutrition, but also a source of comfort. In fact, research has shown that non-nutritive sucking sucking for comfort more than food is one of the earliest ways babies learn to settle. Because our first three babies went an average of three hours between feedings, or even four hours once we added solid food to their diet in the early months, she expected the same from Hayden. Her approach with the first three was to feed them when they cried.
But when Hayden cried one hour after being fed, she wondered what to do.
Harsh consequences, punishments and warnings may backfire with challenging, highly reactive kids.
Of course, feeding is what Hayden needed, Martha discovered. Yet how could this be? Yes, you will feel like a human pacifier, because you are. Nursing is a wonderful timeout when we are both wearing thin. It alleviates a tightened clash of the wills and provides a calm and loving oasis where we are both refreshed. I am always grateful for prolactin. Not only do high need babies breastfeed more frequently, the need for breastfeeding lasts longer.
These babies are notoriously slow to wean. They realize that they have a good thing going and it would be foolish to give it up quickly. It is not unusual for high need babies unless forced to wean before their time to breastfeed at least two years.
More Discipline Isn't The Answer For A High-Maintenance 'Orchid Child’ | HuffPost Canada
Without extended breastfeeding, this child would be much more difficult to deal with. Woe to the parent who offers baby the rattle when he is expecting a breast. Suppose he did not use the kind of persistent cry that ensures a response. If the child feels that she can trust her caregivers, she will eventually learn to make her demands in a more socially acceptable way, rather than wildly overwhelming the whole caregiving environment. With parents who both respond to and wisely channel her demands, the high need child develops into a person with determination, one who will fight for her rights.
The child becomes a leader instead of a follower, one who does not just follow the path of least resistance and do what everyone else is doing. Certainly, our country needs more of such citizens. Being demanding is the trait of high need children that is most likely to drive parents bananas, but it is also the trait that drives children to succeed and excel.
A high need child with a corresponding demanding personality will, if nurtured and channeled appropriately during the formative years, exhaust teachers as she did her parents; yet she will also be able to extract from adult resources, such as teachers, the level of help and education she will need to thrive in academic and social endeavors. As the high need infant grows into a high need toddler and child, parents must also help her learn that her demands must be balanced against the needs of others, so that she can learn to be a likeable and compassionate person as well as a demanding one.
Helping a demanding infant develop a persistent personality without becoming a controlling person is one of the challenges we will discuss throughout this book. You would think that high need babies would need more sleep; certainly their tired parents do. Click here for more information on high need babies and why they sleep differently and click here for nighttime parenting tips for you and your baby.
The best thing I can do is to continue to provide a nurturing environment conducive to sleep and realize that she will eventually sleep more and so will I. It seems like a direct attack on your abilities. There will be days when you nurse, rock, walk, drive, wear, and try every comforting technique known to man or woman, and nothing will work. You do the best you can, and the rest is up to the baby. You have not failed as a mother even if your baby is miserable much of the time. This is simply part of his personality. Meanwhile, keep experimenting with one comforting tool after another, and you will eventually discover one that works — — at least for that day.
Then you will feel like a genius! Constant trial and error is how you build up your baby-soothing abilities.
- A Compilation of Top 10 inspiring quotes on attitude.
- Galaxy Gate II: The Angel Kingdom.
- Get the latest from TODAY;
- Love Has No Borders - How Faith Leaders Resisted Alabamas Harsh Immigration Law.
- More about Gregory;
- Help! My Kid Is High-Maintenance!!
High need babies are inconsistently appeased. You will need lots of variety in your bag of comforting tricks. Rocking, walking, using carriers, singing lullabies, tummy position, back position, side position, infant seats, pacifiers, tilting the mattress of the bed, bringing him to bed with us, cuddling him on breasts or bare chest, bathing him just before sleep time, hot water bottles wrapped inside a fake fur animal, letting him stay awake until midnight before starting-to-sleep procedures, starting right after dinner, letting him cry, not letting him cry, nothing seemed to work.
Some of these things worked some of the time, nothing worked all the time.